Evil, Thy Name is Steely McBeam

The Steelers are supposed to be a proud, simple team, unadorned by pageantry, save a couple polka fight songs. However, in a little bit of 75th anniversary whimsy, the team decided to unveil a mascot in the form of a gruff, beetle-browed and apparently jaundiced steelworker. And that was a forgivable annoyance.

But then the front office thought, "Hey! We should probably give him a name." They solicited fan input and received 70,000 submissions. The chosen appellation?

Steely McBeam.

Clearly, I am not pleased. Remember how some people wanted to track down the woman whose car Big Ben impaled himself upon? That was wrong. But if you wish to do the same to Diane Roles, the woman responsible for this sickening nom de mascot, well, can't really fault you on that one.

Why are these people not throwing Molotov cocktails?


Anonymous said...

Sorry, but what the fuck does "bettle-browd" mean?

Did you mean "Beetle Browed"?

Couldn't tell with the extra T, missing e's and an uncalled for hyphen.

Im convniced a 12 year old Steeler fan wrote this, or some adult with down syndrome tendencies using his elbows to type on a Tandy computer attached keyboard.

Christmas Ape said...

It's fixed. I'm CONVNICED you're satisfied now, pedantic one.

TheStarterWife said...

Phooey. Two weeks from now you're going to forget big yellow guy is there.

(Please be true, please be true.)

bonilla disciple said...

thank god there is a blog for DC steeler fans. I live 3 blocks from the pour house and can't wait to start working on my monday hangover during pregame sundays.