Bring It On

Have you ever been right in the middle of a relatively pleasant day when you realize you maaaaaaay have failed to wipe down below as much as you should have last time you played Kerplunk? Chipotle, Qdoba, Moe’s, whatever it was…it’s making you squirm now.

That’s the Cleveland Browns. They were good, now they’re shitty and they’ll sneak up on you if you don’t put’em away clean.

The Cowboys made efficient work of the Browns last week. Derek Anderson was clearly out of sync with the offense and not communicating well with his receivers. “Sgt. Winslow” was the only Brownie with more than one reception. Browns fans certainly have the fact that both Anderson and Braylon Edwards missed significant preseason time to point to as a cause for this. Keep in mind, as bad as their O was, it was Cleveland’s secondary that allowed T.O. and Patrick Crayton to get significant yardage for the ‘Boys and bust open the game. Additionally, the Cowboys are FUCKING GOOD…so where does that leave us? According to Vegas, nearly a touchdown favorite Sunday and I don’t like that one bit. Where did all of the “experts” who picked the Brownies to come out of the AFC North go (King, Pasquarelli, Banks)? Asshats.

My concerns are more geared toward the O-line (as always) and special teams, with Josh Cribbs capable of a home run at any given moment. We still can’t afford to lose the much ballyhooed “turnover battle” and must effectively stuff Jamal “dime-bag” Lewis who averaged almost 5 yards a carry last week until they were forced to abandon the run.Unfortunately, this game has migrated into the "at best, relieved/at worst, drinking myself into a coma" category. The 8PM kickoff ensures I'll be well on my way to numbing whatever comes my way. Fuck.

I hope my nerves (and bowels) can take this..


Sargent said...

Yea...Vegas giving you guys more points than they gave the Cowboys is a bit odd.

All I know that is if this rain keeps up, it's going to be like last year's game against Miami...

Spatula said...

I love these night games. That way I get to drive an hour to my shit-tastic job the next morning. Of course, if we can beat the Turds it'll be worth it.

Joey Porter’s Pit Bulls said...

The Browns gave up 30 first downs to Dallas. 30?!! Put 'em down, put 'em down now. This is perfect. Gotta figure Romoeo Crennel is panicking. Which has to feed over to the rest of the team. Hustle 'n flow, baby, hustle 'n flow. Deensive mantra: "WHUP that trick! WHUP that trick! WHUP that trick!"