Mike Preston Brainfarts Sound Like Drama

Mike Preston is The Baltimore Sun's resident Ravens homer hack par excellence. So grating are his half-baked or purposefully inflammatory views that he even manages to piss off hometown Ratbird fans with regularity.

Last year, I was in the press box in Baltimore for the Sunday night Week 12 game and this asshole was flapping off with the usual assortment of Ravens trash talk about the Steelers that you could read from fuckwits in comment sections of fifth-rate team blogs. And naturally some of his colleagues were yukking it up with him. That's some nice journalistic integrity you've got there, Sun. True to form, a few days ago on The Sun's web site, he posted an entry on the Ravens Insider blog decrying Ben Roethlisberger supposedly sustaining a foot injury against Buffalo for the sake of pregame theatrics. Of course he did.

As Roethlisberger limped off the field at halftime of the Steelers game against Buffalo last week, I laughed because I knew there was going to be some drama with an injury. If it wasn't going to be his foot that hurt, then it was going to be his big toe or his little finger, or his butt or a tooth. Always something.

I can understand why Roethlisberger might not want to play. He will be missing his two starting offensive tackles, and I don't think the Steelers can handle the pressure the Ravens will bring. But we all know that Big Ben will play. He'll get the ankle taped, take a pain killer and then play.

That's PFT-level mouthbreathing retardery, yet there are scores of fuckwit Ratbirds fans backing him up in the comments. Typical.

Yes, Roethlisberger only sustained a foot injury to ramp up the drama for the following week's game. Of this you can be certain. The injuries to Le'Ron McClain and Michael Oher? Why, those are understandable dings in the course of playing tough. I must have missed the part where Roethlisberger was showing off his walking book to reporters this week while shouting over-the-top promises about there being nothing in the world that could hold him back. That'd be too much like Terrell Suggs' histrionics before the 2008 AFC Title Game.

It should also be noted that the Ravens are once again distributing the knockoff rally towels they used in the home game last year. A fantastically hypocritical move by a fan base that glories in mocking the traditions of Steelers fans.


gamechump said...

every week of the year, i think, "i dislike the ravens and their fans. i dislike them. but they are a good team, and it will be a hard game. i hope we win."
then the week we actually PLAY them comes around, i start reading retarded shit from the house carcetti built and it just makes me HATE THEM. its funny how i go from dislike to hate so quickly. but i think im justified. bunch of camo wearing fucktards.

Spatula said...

"bunch of _purple_ camo wearing fucktards."